Magic Envelope

February, 7, 2012 Tuesday

Oddly enough I had some of the greatest sleep I have ever had last night.  I was hopeful to hear from my father early in the morning but when I didn’t I went about my day, having breakfast, doing my chores and chatting with my grandmother.  Dad called around 11 am and wanted me to fax him a letter turning power over to him to be able to pick up my packet from DHL.  Although I had already done that the first time we were in Juarez the officials there neglected to tell us that the letter is only good for 2 months.  Now I had to run around town finding a power of attorney letter, two witnesses and a fax.  By noon I have everything sent and I am waiting for a response.  Its 12:30 when dad calls me upset at all the hoops they are having us jump through.  I am oddly calm because I know this is a sign. I am not going home, at least not now.  They didn’t like the fax because the pictures of the witnesses could not be seen clearly and I must now find the nearest cyber café scan and send the information to some strange email address in Juarez.  It’s close to 1 pm when dad calls back and reads me my fate.  My heart stops beating and my lungs stop pumping air just to make sure I hear him clearly “your application has been referred and they need more evidence, they say we haven’t been able to prove how your husband’s hard ship”.  The words ring through my head, my arms, my legs, my stomach and my heart.  I try to remain calm and I hear my voice crack, I don’t want to cry this “thing” isn’t worth one more of my tears.  I hear my dad’s voice saying something but frankly I didn’t make out anything after that magical sentence.  I am not going home.

                                                         

I am not sure how I got back home since I couldn’t feel my body let alone my legs after I hung up the phone with my dad.  Back at home I remember that three years ago today life sent me the most amazing man sitting in a Starbucks café on a rainy day.  In all the madness I had neglected to acknowledge that today is the anniversary of a great and miraculous event.  I never thought I would find Mr. Right and I had accepted to fill my life with other things that were important to me but life had other plans for me and sent me the most amazing man… for me!  I text him that I love him, that nothing can keep us apart, curl up in the fetus position in bed, cry and wait for the night to cover me.  I am not going home.